Friday, May 22, 2009

New beginnings and sad goodbyes

As I write this post it really is my last day of college. It's about 12:20 in the morning and it's so weird to think that in about twelve hours I'll be leaving this dorm room, packing stuff into my truck and my dad's Rav-4, and telling my roommate goodbye. And I'll officially have enough hours under my belt to be classified as a sophomore in college. Crazy right?

In a way, this is a new beginning. I'm going to be interning at the youth group in my church. I'm on the verge of having a work of fiction published, and I'm leaving my first year of college. It's all so new and different, but I like it, and it's all very welcomed.

I have come to the very profound and unshaky revelation that I have fallen in love with writing. God is my first love and always will be. That is not something to be questioned. And my family comes next, as they should. But I know that God has given me this gift of writing for a reason and that when I write, in any way, shape or form, I am praising him. To call it a passion would be a very harsh understatement. It is something so much more. I feel in a way it is a part of me that needs nourishment just like my soul or spirit would. It's just that little added part inside of me created by God. I don't know what I would do without it.

In the movie "Serendipity," there is a statement made at the end that I don't think will ever leave me. It says something along the lines of how a life is not worth living unless it is lived with passion. I love that. Do you have passion? Are you passionate for something? Is there something that moves you beyond words and expression?

There are little things that move me in life: black and white photos of deep meaning, star-filled nights, the movie "Elizabethtown,"but then there also big things that move me: God, writing, classics written over one hundred years ago by authors such as Charlotte Bronte and Jane Austen. Stories of missionaries like Jim Elliot and the other four who were killed for their faith in Ecuador; these are the things that move me.

I don't care what it is that fuels your heart and stirs you to want to be a better person. It doesn't have to be the most profound thing in the world. It can be as simple as a sunrise. But whatever it is, do it. If you love to sing, do it. If you love to help others, do it. If you love to take long walks in the park with just you and God, do it. I am more than passionate about writing so I do it, and I do it often, and I do it to praise the passion-giver. God has given me this gift, this ability, and words cannot express my gratitude for it.

This could be one of my last posts for awhile depending on how often I will be near the Internet when I return home. I will keep updating about the publishing process and everything that will be happening with that. I will also update about the internship and all the camps I will be attending.

Seek God. Run to him and fall into his arms of love. You will find him if you seek him with all of your heart.

Lost in his immeasurable grace and love,
Jana

1 comment:

Hannah said...

I bet within a year, you could probably print all of your blog posts and publish THEM as a book!

I have always known you were a great writer. And I still say that whenever you DO get your book published, I want a first-edition with your signature in it!

That way in 5-10 years when you become famous,... well, you know the rest!